HOMER BAILEY = SALVATION

Well, no. Not really. But it is clearly the single biggest highlight of the year since Opening Day. I'm pretty excited. Chances are he'll do poorly, he'll do average, or he'll do a dang impressive job. Chances are 50-50-50 across the board. They do add up to 150%, I am aware of this fact.

What's interesting to me is the kid's name is Homer. He's a PITCHER. His name is Homer. Not a great connotation. Better than Grant Balfour, I guess.